Fruit of my loins

I have always wanted an heir . To have a little Sith Lord to truly call my own. Unfortunately, wallowing in the Darkside 24/7 causes more than a person's face to shrivel up. I thought about going to Kamino and getting a clone made of myself, but hey, who wants to hang out with a little version of themselves all day (I'm not making judgments). After Jango Fett was separated from his head, I thought about adopting Boba, but Count Dooku kind of glommed on to him. Mind you, Dooku gets hellaciously pissed when he and Boba are at restaurants and the waitress droid keeps referring to Boba as "your grandson".
I feel that I have so many evil things I could teach a child. We could fry a Womp Rat with force lightning. I could teach him to choke the other kids at school for making fun of his cowl. Alas, It looks like I will stuck with going the apprentice route. Who's going to take care of me when I get too old to conjure up a good force storm?